Have you ever had friends that made you say to yourself, "If only I could lock those two in a room together, I'm sure they'd hit it off!"? Well, here's your chance! With Singles, you get to play matchmaker to a pair of people who share an apartment. Your goal as the voyeuristic player is clear from the beginning - get these two in bed with each other. Doing this involves a lot of mundane tasks, including tending to their needs (like sending them to the bathroom), decorating their apartment, and delegating chores to keep the two roommates happy. For the most part, this game is an obvious copy of The Sims, without the same depth of gameplay. Singles focuses more on building a romantic relationship, and features uncensored nudity. That's right - this game is available through download only (play the trial with option to purchase) and is rated AO. There are no black bands or pixilation to cover up bare breasts or anything like that, although a giant toilet paper roll icon appears over the characters as they go to the bathroom. I guess some things are still a little bit too taboo.

The game starts off by letting you match up two roommates. While the women generally look ok, all the men look like creeps. Each character has a generic description, detailing their personalities - ranging from the girl next door to the ultimate party guy. However, when it comes to gameplay, it doesn't really matter who you choose. In the world of Singles, there are no bad matches, and each hookup requires about the same amount of attention and effort. What is intriguing is the "rainbow" mode, which allows you to select a homosexual character. Rainbow mode only has one male and one female to choose from, who are both sadly generic. There is the effeminate man and the butch woman. Yet, like with all the other characters, their backgrounds are strictly superficial. The other character doesn't have to be homosexual for an intimate relationship to form. In fact, it is possible have the gay man and lesbian woman get together. This kind of thing can be considered a running theme throughout the game: The developers, Rotobee, are brave enough to challenge existing taboos, but flake out on the delivery.

It seems like the developers dedicated all their efforts to being risqué, but forgot how relationships work. In Singles, the main way to form a relationship is through talking. Each mode of conversation increases the amount of experience in a category and awards points at certain levels. For example, to become good friends, you can tell jokes. After enough experience has been accumulated, the two "graduate" to the next level of friendship, opening up more talk options. Experience points can be spent on specific skills, like cooking, cleaning, being flirty, or telling jokes. Repeat this cycle until you get the desired results. However, there aren't a whole lot of talk options to choose from. Most are locked off, forcing players to repeat the same things over and over, with the same animations until they "level up." After listening to the same thing repeatedly spoken in the Singles special brand of gibberish language, we longed to hear Simmese. Although you can switch control back and forth between either characters, there doesn't seem to be a purpose to it. Options for both characters are identical. There is nothing that the man would talk about that a woman wouldn't, nor vice-versa. You can use the "flirt" option over and over again, and the opposite person never rejects the advances. Additionally, there is an odd distinction between "sensuality" and "romance" in the game. We're not quite sure why these are separate categories, but it makes it possible for a couple to be completely comfortable French-kissing each other, but too shy to hug. This is just an example of the game's biggest problem of all - the characters and their relationships are completely mechanical, and in no way represent how a real relationship would work out.

First and foremost, except for leaving to go to work and performing small tasks (like buying gifts), there is no life outside the apartment. There is no way to send characters to go out on dates, meet up for lunch, call each other up on cell phones, or anything that a real relationship would entail. All meals happen inside the apartment, and they have to be eating together in order for interaction to happen. While the characters are able to talk to people on the phone, there are no friends to invite over, and no parties that can be thrown. There isn't even any alcohol in the game. It's hard to call this title a game, since both characters run off to work and disappear for eight hours a day every Mon-Fri. When they return, they have a ton of needs that need to be met, leaving very little time for banter before spending another few hours sleeping. This forces to player to frantically try to build up their relationship as much as possible over the weekend. There are no random events that would cause the characters to become more intimate or drive them apart. None of the characters appear as though they'd object to a one-night stand, but there's no option for that either.

While the A.I. generally does a decent job taking care of the character's needs when you're not controlling him/her, some of the behavior can be positively baffling. The men will freak out when seen walking around in their boxer shorts, even in front of another man. There are times when a character will go bursting into the bathroom when it is already occupied, then become too bladder shy to follow through. There are no characters who are comfortable with their bodies. Obviously, the developers haven't watched enough episodes of The Real World. You could have both characters walking around naked for weeks, without food or bathroom breaks, and they will still be shy in front of each other. Also, for a game that's all about getting things on, the characters sure aren't hot to trot. They will refuse intercourse unless the apartment has double size beds.

That is not to say that everything about this game is bad. The graphics are decent, and the rotating camera gives a nice view of the apartment. Players will have to spend the characters' hard earned money to decorate and expand the apartment. However, there isn't a great deal of furniture to choose from and most of it is pretty ugly. Not to mention, day and night transitions aren't smooth. The game stutters whenever a new lighting scene is loaded, breaking whatever immersion it tries to achieve. Winning the game - getting them married - isn't very rewarding. It just means continuing the game with a married couple at a beachside condo, which effectively changes nothing. Practically the same thing can be achieved by selecting the sandbox mode instead of the campaign mode.

Eidos took a risk in publishing this Sims knock-off. While it's great that Singles takes on taboo topics, it only does so at a superficial level, and doesn't follow through in any way. Even some of the story dialogue (all in text), often laden with sexual innuendo, just isn't funny. There is no way to care for any of the bland characters. While there are certainly worse titles out there, Singles simply doesn't cut it as a relationship sim. It barely qualifies as a game. The only "challenge" here is the tedium of tending to their needs. Its campiness may be charming enough to entertain the curious-minded for a little while, but nothing long lasting. It's too bad, because there could have been potential here. Although the game is rated Adults Only, it definitely isn't for mature audiences.