Resident Evil


[The following dialogue gets spoken by Chris after defeating Plant 42.]

Chris: Looks like we got to the...root of the problem.

Corny Meter: 10

Chris almost sounds like he's firing off a James Bond-esque quote with this one. Heck, it even sounds more like Austin Powers at this point. "He'll never get a-head in life."

[The following quote can be heard after Jill escapes nearly being crushed.]

Barry Burton: "That was too close. You were almost a Jill sandwich!"

Corny Meter: 8

The Lament of Barry Burton
Something along the lines of "You were almost crushed to death!" or "Man, that was close!" would have fared far better than the likes of being called a "Jill sandwich". Her nervous response of "Thanks..." didn't do much either. She should've implied the need for bread and cheese. Well, wait, Resident Evil's dialogue already comes with cheese. Heh.

[This quote comes from Barry while walking through a monster-filled hallway.]

Barry Burton: "WHOOOOAAAAA! This hall is dangerous!"

Corny Meter: 8

Yes, Barry, players already KNOW that the hall was dangerous. See, the whole damn mansion has been plagued with zombies and other Umbrella-created menaces. Not just the hallway. Imagine the bathrooms. UGH.

[This quote just HAD to be included...]

Barry Burton: "Here, take this lock pick. I'm sure that you, the master of unlocking, will make use of it."

Corny Meter: 10

Really, can there be such a thing as a "master of unlocking"? Does some kind of special school degree exist to decree someone as a specialist in undoing locks? No matter, this line lives in Resident Evil infamy and even inspired a fun little mode in Capcom's Resident Evil game for the Nintendo DS, where gamers could play through a mode called Master of Knifing. No, that doesn't require a degree either.

Barry Burton: "Let's hope this is not Chris' blood."

Corny meter: 9

It wouldn't be wrong to wish that a puddle of blood didn't belong to a comrade. However, the way that Barry said it, he came off like a student just getting into crime scene investigation rather than a S.T.A.R.S. veteran. His further affirmation of "Chris is our old partner, y'know" wasn't really needed either. They obviously work together as a team. Duh!