WARNING: We take no responsibility in your firing.

Halo 3 rocket blasts its way to stores September 25, packing an exciting single player campaign and most importantly, thrilling multiplayer matches against thousands of trigger happy gamers. Many unfortunate souls, however, must sit at work and daydream about sniping enemies and running them over in a warthog. Save you, of course. Just call out using these emails. We're sure your boss will understand.

Subject: Out, due to illness.

Hello Mr./Miss/Mrs. [insert boss' last name]. Just want to let you know that I won't be able to make it into work today, due to an illness affecting my entire family. The youngest came in contact with this strange parasite. Our doctor, Prophet Truthman couldn't ID it, and for now, simply calls it the Flood. I won't bother you with the details of what it does. With that said, I plan to work from home and will return tomorrow. I called, but communications were abruptly cut off.

That's the ticket, marine! Show those clowns in the board room that nothing is going to come between you and your plasma sword.

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