Despite a healthy portfolio of 2D brawlers, Capcom hasn't been able to translate that magic into a 3D world. It's just been one crappy game after the other, the abominable Final Fight Streetwise being the most vile. And now, after years of failure, there's God Hand, an over the top, tongue-in-cheek beat-em-up from Okami producer Atsushi Inaba and Resident Evil 4 director Shinji Mikami. It's definitely not going to light the world ablaze, primarily becauseit's a bit too bizarre for western audiences, but damnit, this game is good. It's akin to the film Snakes on a Plane. It's rough around the edges, the acting is seriously questionable, and the jokes are so low brow you're bound to trip over them, but it's so bizarre, so completely ridiculous, that it's almost impossible to resist. That is, if you can stomach a flamboyant tag team clad in festive feather outfits. The more that turns you on, the more you'll enjoy the ride.

The primary reason why I'm seriously digging this game is because it reminds me of Rising Zan: The Samurai Gunman, a quirky PSOne classic that never takes itself seriously. That game's about as polished as shark skin (it's quite ugly to boot), but its over-the-top shenanigans transcend its many glitches, and the same thing's happened with God Hand. Here is Capcom saying, "We just don't care." I mean, that's not necessarily a fair assessment. I'm sure that the developers care on some level, but they're not trying to make a serious 3D beat-em-up. It's stupid for a reason, and if you're offended by it, well, that's your own fault for missing the joke. This isn't a game for Mr. Serious.

Basically, you're some drifter named Gene, a poor schmuck that had one of his arms lopped off. But through mysterious circumstances, it's replaced with the God Hand, some super powerful weapon that allows Gene (and you) to kick some serious ass. So you wander into a Wild West-themed town, and all you do, at least from what I've seen, is run from point A to point B, collecting various items and beating the crap out of small bands of thugs, except the game is utterly bizarre. In one of the opening scenes, for example, some big fat guy bursts through a door and trips because he's a clumsy oaf. And this event was preceded by a cut scene in which Gene and his female companion Olivia are arguing over who's sexier. Now combine that with the main bad guys, a gruesome foursome known as the Four Devas (yes, pronounced diva), and you should have a better idea of what you're in for.

At first, the combat is real simplistic. Gene's got a main punch (seems more like a bitch slap, really) as well as two different types of kicks. He also has some special moves. By collecting Roulette Orbs and pressing R1, the game slows down and you're greeted by the Roulette Wheel, which is a collection of devastating attacks and such pain moves as the Wild Pitch, the Shockwave, La Bomba, and my own personal favorite, the Ball Buster (it is as it sounds). You can cycle through these attacks with R1, and you unleash one by pressing X. All of them appear to drain significant amounts of energy, but you need those orbs to pull them off. They're not scarce, but it's easy to paint yourself into a corner against some of the tougher enemies, so you'll probably be better off if you save the orbs for later. Finally, if you really want to bring the pain, you can unleash the power of your God Hand by filling your Tension Gauge (achieved by attacking and intimidating enemies) and pressing R2.

Much to my surprise, the game's combat system has serious depth. Over the course of play, you'll acquire new moves, and more can be purchased in between levels. There's also plenty of combos, so it's possible to really smack the stuffing out of someone, though there are weapons lying about such as explosive barrels, pipes, and steel girders. Barging into a room and wailing on some ugly piece of garbage with a pipe never gets old. I'm also quite fond of God Hand's recreational activities. In addition to shopping, you can compete in fighting tournaments as well as gamble in the casino, which features video poker, slots, and blackjack, all of which are polished and quite entertaining. Games such as this are often criticized for lack of depth, so there you go! Bored of the fighting? Play some poker.

You might get a good hand or hit it big playing slots, but one thing you're probably not going to do is waltz right through this game. God Hand is pretty hard. Health is oftentimes about as scarce as ice cream in a desert, and if you lose, you have to restart from the beginning of the stage. Of course, that's not a bad thing. I'm all for a challenge, even if it means having to run through the same ugly punks. This game isn't for the weak, and pansies need not apply.

I seriously doubt that God Hand will be a hot holiday title, but at the very least, its wild antics should find an audience. Look for my review on the game's October 10 ship date.