Gaming's Biggest Wimps

January 03, 2008 | By: Chris Buffa

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Even video games have their fair share of pansies.

The Wimps

Heroes often possess unshakeable confidence, bulging biceps or in Lara Croft's case, heaving cleavage. They thrust themselves into danger without much thought, their only goal to save humanity from unspeakable horrors or just the average, innocent looking goomba. But not everyone can be Gears of War's Marcus Phoenix or Resident Evil's Chris Redfield. The following wimps, "girly men" if you will, manage to hog the spotlight despite their inability to turn coal into diamonds with their bare hands.

By Chris Buffa

Source: Nintendo

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Reader Comments (30)

rocxetwolf at 9:58 am on March 25th 2009

Dr. Robotnik was changed to Eggman quite a few games ago, guess to make him, kiddie friendly

electrictibet at 9:48 am on March 25th 2009

His name is spelled Marcus Fenix. You guys are not nearly as nerdy as you pretend if you didn't know that. And note to annoying people, the mention him in the overview and misspell his name. I'm not saying he should be on the list.

quintusbolivius at 9:44 am on March 25th 2009

If you're going to bash a video game character, please have the courtesy to look up the proper name for it. Dr. Robotnik should be insulted at the incorrect naming.

squierfreak09 at 9:24 am on March 25th 2009

Man, I generally like these reviews. But this one is really stupid. If you're gonna write a piece, make sure you've got enough characters that actually matter, so you don't have to dip into Rock Band musicians. Sorry man, this was crap. You could've included Toad, or Tingle from Zelda, or Lucas from Smash Bros. Brawl (I think he's from Earthbound with Ness). But needless to say, you had more options than you used. Poorly Done.

js2isking at 9:18 am on March 25th 2009

Prince shouldn't be on there. Katamari isn't exactly the sort of game you'd have Solid Snake as a char on, so lack of toughness is justified.

xmcwaters at 9:16 am on March 25th 2009

bushnell: ever heard the story 'the boy who cried wolf'?

thecmplx at 9:12 am on March 25th 2009

Slippy Toad really was a ***** in Starfox 64. Eggman is kind of an ass too. Whenever you finally destroy whatever craft he's fighting you from, he usually runs away flailing his arms. That jerk.